Hey - I want in on this matchmaker deal... :P Only two requirements - she's cute and likes to ride - either on back or on her own. Tired of riding solo and being made to feel bad about it.

As for advice... I already gave some - but here is a bit more... and it comes as a point of principle. Principles btw - comes with age and experience - and I am not saying this negatively, but as a matter of fact - it seems like all 3 categories are missing in both relationships being discussed here.

Never, EVER stay with someone out of pity or mercy. Ever. It will only make a bad situation worse and give false feelings to everyone that is involved. This is not good, and it will end badly. If you are staying with someone because you feel bad for them or you are worried about hurting them - then the relathionship is long over with. Relationships are supposed to be two-way streets. In both of your cases (spook & ash) - you are giving up yourself and your needs in the relationship in order to appease the other person. This changes the relationship to a one-way street. When it gets like that - you have to put your own thoughts and needs first. NO - THIS ISN'T SELFISH... so get over that. There is no soft, pillowed landing from a relationship when one person's head & heart isn't in it anymore.

Prolonging it because you feel bad will only open up greater and greater opportunity for it to get really whacked out when you finally give your SO the axe. I'm talking - chasing you around town, harasshing your friends, camping outside your house at night - **** like that.... and I know for a fact that DG doesn't want to come and have to respond to a situation like that for you two. I promise you she will be the first one to attest that what I am saying is the truth here - because both her and I have responded to hundreds of calls that have escalated from circumstances like this - and we only ended up responding because things got bad... real bad... and they usually do really quick - and it will be something you never thought the other person would be capable of doing.

If you are not getting what want and need out of a relationship, and you have made an effort to correct it and it has not changed - then don't stick around just for the other person's sake. You gotta look out for you, and you gotta put you first in a situation like this. It sucks, and it is hard as hell, but you gotta do it - for your own sake. This is exactly why I have exited my marriage... and at my doing. I gotta live for me a little bit. And so do both of you. So do it.

Touch that dial, turn me on, start me like motor - make me run, turn that dial - all the way, shoot me like rocket into space - lovin every minute of it.

 

Loverboy

 

hell yeah... big hair bands FTW

 

Man I love 80's music LOL....puts a number on my age doesn't it LOL

 

Scrobak U are a friggin player i finally laughed with that one that was a good way at braking that down very well dome

 

I'm lost on the player bit... ???

But I hope what I said made some sense... and I want you to know I am glad & proud to hear that you have started the difficult process of severing yourself from her & the relationship. If a relationship can be saved, I am all for saving it... but when it gets to a certain point... well... that's it. Keep yourself and your mind busy... be with friends, and do the things you used to long ago.